When the Left Foot Leads

Over the last few months I’ve been letting my left foot lead, I am naturally right handed, which means that mostly my right foot is the ‘leader’.

However, I’ve been experiencing pain in the left big toe. 

I’ve tried various things to fix it; stretches, toe spacers, rotations, keeping it warm, tiger balm etc. And, because I am who I am, energy work, communication and patient compassion.

But the pain didn’t change.

What did happen was that it: caused me to slow down, to be more measured in my gait, to stand more upright.

Then I noticed, that when I spoke with it and opened a space for body-to-head dialogue (without pressure or desire of outcome), more often, I was able to hear it.  Not always- because- well, I’m human, and sometimes stuck in the middle of the feeling of frustration and pain, and just want it done with, I just want to move easily again.

But when I could hear it, it was asking me to do things differently.

Once, I was in the local woods with my young Labrador, and she was sniffing and rushing amongst the trees joyfully, I took some time for me and asked my left foot to lead- “show me where you want to go” and straight away we moved off the muddy paths that had been slippery and hard work and went within the trees. 

We stepped over fallen logs, sloshed playfully through little streams/ running puddles, waded through swaths of dead ferns and bracken. 

And I noticed some space and peace rose within me. Ease.

Frequently I paused, surveyed, breathed and relaxed. Spying little patches of moss, snapping the twigs underfoot (inner-child heaven!), rustling through leaves, watching the birds bounce across branches, hearing the red kite call out overhead. 

Savouring the beauty of this space, and this time, I rested in the movement and the stillness. Enjoying the moments.

There was no push to go anywhere in particular.  In fact, I desired to stay out longer, enjoy the chill in the air, feeling fresh on my face, curious to see where my left foot took me.

And this became more of a way of being for me.  Letting the left foot lead- to dictate the pace, the direction, the pauses.

This isn’t a permanent way of being yet, because I’m not entirely used to it, but it is becoming so. 

The modern way of life (and the chattiness of my head) can have me moving through the day at quite a pace. My left foot gets tired.  The need to stop and rest becomes clear. 

And I’m learning to hear and trust it.

And it’s learning to trust me to listen.

The outcome?

The pain eased greatly, and the journey has been deep medicine for me.

Why deep medicine? 

And this may be relevant for you too (you know me- I like to share something that might bring insight, care or relief to you).

Like many of us, I’d lived for decades, basing my way of being on the push, the action, and forward motion, that can be characterised by the masculine* energy of our current paradigm- the culture of “just get through it”, ”just do it”, “your value is linked to your productivity”  and of being aware of where you want to go, figuring out how to get there etc.  

But it’s exhausting to live like this if it isn’t your natural essence.

It can also be debilitating mentally because you can feel you come up short, very short.

*(Honestly though,  Divine-masculine energy isn’t about rushing and pushing through, though it does carry the energy of action and structure, but in alignment, respectful  and a sense of loving holding – but that’s for another blog.)

Now my left toe is literally putting her foot down and saying no more. 

It’s time to let the feminine lead even more. 

What does that look like? What does that mean?

It looks like: BE-ing, being present in the moment, allowing yourself to soften towards yourself, becoming more spontaneous, being more creative just for the fun of creating and expressing. 

Leave space for rest.

Allow more peace. 

This leads to an inner sense of spaciousness where the truer you can finally root, and then rise.

This is how to expand now.

Not through efforting, but through BEing.

And, personally, it’s taking time to fully get used to this way of being. 

Obviously, I’m in the job of listening to the energy, the emotions, the body, the nervous system- and then moving forward in harmony.  But I can find it hard to listen too, but resting lets the space open up. (Actually, I find resting more is actually harder to ‘allow’ than everything else!! Lol. ..my brain does like to ferret things out to mull over!) 

But this way of being is worth it. 

And I want to name something clearly here- I believe, this is crucial for those of you in peri- and meno-pause.   

Resting more and listening to the wisdom of the body is the way to navigate this transition with more ease. 

Pushing through ISN’T going to solve what ails you.

Now you may be wondering how you can fit the resting in... I'll talk about this in my next blog, because it’s actually simpler than you might imagine.